Letting them loose

I realized the other day the reason I enjoyed teaching 2nd grade so much was because I had control.  Yes, I had to teach lots of procedures and develop a sense of family in the classroom for all to go smoothly, but by george, I did it.  And I loved it. 

Looking back, I had every moment of the day scheduled for my students and I liked it that way.  I didn't give much chance for misbehavior because I was expecting them to act like little robots in my care.

My own kids don't work that way.  As I write this, I'm letting them just be and well, they're being.  They've moved #3's bed to the door of his closet and who even knows what mischief they've gotten into.  No one is crying, yelling or hurting anyone else.  There will be a mess to clean up, but there was a mess before they began.

I'm learning as a mom that I want my own kids to be able to fill free time without my constant guidance.  I'm also learning that for me to recharge my own batteries, I have to disengage from them sometimes and do something completely for me. 

This morning #1 discovered the joy of making mud pies.  That's one of those things you read on someone else's blog and you think of how delightful that is.  When it's on your blog, you have to be the one to hose the kid off (while he yells and runs from you) and do the lovely laundry that's associated with such fun.

I needed to recharge, so I set the timer for 15 minutes and told the boys I was going to play the piano and sing and no, they couldn't get out the instruments.  They also had to leave me completely alone.  They did.  I played my heart out I'm glad I did. 

This afternoon we're planning to go to the pool.  3 non-swimmers and me.  Promises to be a whipping on my part, but such is the joy of motherhood.

Shamefully prissy noises

I'm many things.  Talkative, optimistic, boisterous, inquisitive are a few that come to mind.  Tough?  Not really.  I was raised to be more of a princess than a field hand.  Unfortunately, I married a man who despite wooing a princess, he really wanted to marry a field hand.  So, in marriage I'm learning how to do such glamorous things, like fix fences, herd cattle and wrestle fish.

We were fishing the other day at our pond when a neighbor came out and needed to talk to Aaron.  Before I realized what was happening, Aaron had disappeared across the fence with the neighbor and I was left alone with the 3 boys on a small dock.  I had a fleeting moment of what I would do if:  one fell in, they all fell in or heaven forbid, one caught a fish.  I know how to swim, but dealing with fish is a new kind of adventure.

I have to brag on myself--I took a deep breath and enjoyed the time fishing with the boys.  They didn't catch anything in Aaron's absence except the dock a few times and unfortunately me once.  Luckily, no blood was drawn.  We had fun.

When Aaron came back he cast lines for the boys and all of a sudden, they all caught fish.  I dutifully went about taking hooks out of fish mouths which I'm still very new at.  I make this ridiculous prissy noise when I touch fish.  I'm not proud of the sound, but ick.  They're slippery and slimy.  #1 was helping me with my task.  When I made that silly sound, he asked, "Mommy, is that noise Spanish for Daddy, please help?"

If you would have told me 10 years ago that this moment would be on my short list of favorite parenting moments I would have laughed at you, but so it is.

Maybe one day "tough" will be in the list of adjectives I use to describe myself.